Child breastfeeding
Almost everyone knows the benefits of breastfeeding – nature’s best food, wonderful immunity, etc. But how long is too long?
Should you allow your child to decide when s/he is ready to quit nursing? Or, should you deliberately set a deadline? For stay-at-home mothers – the few that there are these days – and women with understanding employers who offer onsite daycare or permit young children at work, on-demand feeding for as long as the child wants is often desirable and obtainable. Other women may be able to pump and provide this amazing nourishment even while having their child in daycare. Not everyone, however, is successful pumping – I certainly wasn’t.
But, what if you have breastfed for quite some time, say two years, and you are really ready to stop breastfeeding but your child still wants “Mommy milk”? What is the best way to handle this situation?
And, if your child wants the cuddling which accompanies breastfeeding to settle down for naptime and bedtime, where does that leave Mom when she wants a night off with her friends? Perhaps Mom will go out, but she will leave the babysitter with a cranky child who is extremely difficult to settle down.
One option – if you have a willing physician – is to go back on the birth control pill. Problem solved. Mommy milk has dried up! Is it the physician’s right to say “No” to your request for this option?
There are so many questions around breastfeeding. What is your opinion? I would love to hear it.
I nurse my 5.5 year old, 3 year old, and 8 month old. I have never had any problems with being able to go out with friends or go to work outside the home. My kids aren’t left cranky. When I’m with them they nurse on demand, when I’m not there they don’t nurse. They aren’t dependent on milk to be happy children. When they have access they have milk, if they don’t have access they are happy content children too. If I’m out in the evening and they need to sleep they will go to sleep. Not that I want to be separated from my children this young but I do need to work outside the home and often that means getting home after bed time.
How long is too long? When one of the parties decides they are done is when nursing should stop. There are so many misconceptions about nursing older children. They aren’t dependent on it like a newborn baby is. Attachment and time spent with mom can be independent of nursing or not nursing. Before I had my third and was nursing a 2 and 4 year old I went away for work for 3 days, 7, days, and 10 days. That in no way left them cranky without milk and it did not interfere with our nursing relationship. It isn’t an either or situation. When I came back they picked it up once again.
I don’t know that trying to dry up your milk artificially is the best way of dealing with weaning. Many kids will nurse whether there is milk or no milk. I have nursed through 2 pregnancies with no milk and had little milk after returning from trips away and they didn’t miss a beat.
Thanks for your feedback, Nancy.
As a prenatal instructor and mother, I can honestly say it is up to the individual. I nursed my 3 children longer each time. Knowing it was the last time I would experience breastfeeding, my last son was nursed until 2-1/2. He loved it and I loved it!He was just nursing before bed at that age and it was a comfort thing as well as healthy for both of us. I told him “we wouldn’t be doing this much longer” and he said, “Can we pretend?” So enjoy and don’t worry what others say!
Thanks for your input, Cindy. Breastfeeding is such a wonderful bonding experience with your child. I sincerely wish I had breastfed my children longer.
The length of time which is considered to be within “normal” limits for breast-feeding seems to be culturally determined. Some cultures which are closer to nature often breast-feed for 7 years, while in North America, it appears that 2 -3 years of age is considered the limit. A few decades ago, it was 6 months or a year max.
Knowing the benefits of breast-feeding and one’s own constraints; and the child’s needs and feelings; one has to make up one’s own mind about what works for you and your children.
Worrying about what is considered by society or others to be “too long” is neither healthy nor useful.
Thanks so much for your feedback, Leslirae.